We’ve employed our literary chops to write a brief, preemptive eulogy for RIM, in the style of John Milton’s Lycidas. Enjoy.
’tis a shame you’re barely alive,
BB10 seems nary a glimmer,
In advance of the iPhone 5.
You were the queen of my heart and my thumbs,
A true successor the Palm Pilot,
But now my heart numbs,
As I resign myself to my iLot.
I did love your tactile feel,
The smoothness of your back,
Ne’ermind the dated scrollwheel,
Your email servers ne’er gave me flak.
For so long, you, I wished to hold,
To use that “pinch to zoom,”
Alas! I only had a touchscreen with the Bold,
And by then you were near’ in your tomb.
You promised me a store with every app,
A tablet to match the iPad,
But all I got was crap,
And the Playbook just made me mad.
And so I’ve given up the keyboard,
I’ve gone to the land of Angry Birds,
In your absence, Android’s scored,
And I’m just plain out of words.